Settling Down

A friend posted this on my wall the other day…

Little did she know “settling down” has been on my mind A LOT lately. Partially due to the fact that my best friend is getting married and we’ve been dress shopping a few times in the past month. Mostly due to the fact that (whether I like it or not) ever since I was a wee-one, I imagined getting married and doing all those things married people do. Which is odd because I had no central man figure in my life growing up (which I have a post about coming up) and my mom never dated. Like never. Marriage wasn’t something I was actually exposed to as a child…it was still something I romanticized.

And let’s be real. Damn Pinterest is making me feel a little antsy about settling down. All those amazing wedding ideas just flashing themselves at me. OF COURSE I have to pin them…in a board I call “Futures.”

But at the end of the day, I know I’m not even ready for that. I have plans to move in the next year. I have a lot more to worry about, and it doesn’t involve lace sleeves and trumpet shapes. I still daydream. And I wonder when I know when I’m ready? I guess I’ll know when I’m asked. And for some reason this video made me feel better about it all. Like I’m not the only one…with fears of suburbia (see my Revolutionary Road post) and the urge to settle down.

Yours feeling less alone thanks to Kimbra,


Guest Blogger – 1foot: Single And Not Looking, or Save Your Pity, Relationshipped Friends!

(This post is part of an awesome series of awesome 25swf guest bloggers- read about them here!)

I got asked out on a date a while ago. I accepted and we made plans. Then I thought about it some more and cancelled the date.

WHAT??!! But, 1foot, you’re… you know… *stage whisper* SINGLE…

Yep. I am! And I didn’t like the guy who asked and knew I wouldn’t be interested in him no matter how many dinners we had and… the list goes on.

I wanted to write about why I’m happy that I’m single, but it’s hard to write such things without sounding sort of dippy or defensive. But, so it’s out there in the most direct way possible – I’m happy I’m single right now, and I’m not saying that in a dippy or defensive way. I obviously still want someone to love me at some point in that relationshippy way; I’m not denying that that is a happy and fulfilling way to exist sometimes.

BUT Continue reading

Peace, at last

I was complaining a couple weeks ago because I couldn’t get my Zen on, but something happened last week that blew my mind.

Another text, but this one was different. I was so…grateful. I guess is the best way to describe it.

Thanks Universe, 25swf

One Year Ago Today

Facebook started it.

The one year ago today business.

I’m an extremely reflective person (stating the obvious) and I probably think too much (Facebook doesn’t help), but sometimes when I think about one year ago today I am just utterly amazed.

One year ago on September 2 I broke up with The Unmentionable One (stated with a low, raspy, silly voice), bought a car, moved out of said person’s apartment, and felt like the loneliest person in the world.

Now, well…let’s see…

Now I’m in disbelief that it was one year ago that all this happened. It feels like three years.

I met someone (Mr. M) in March who made me realize that the world was a beautiful place, and dreams can come true…Disney style. Being so far on each of these spectrum’s in the same year is both refreshing and terrifying. One of the reasons I don’t like to write about happiness is I’m afraid I will lose it. If I acknowledge it, how long before it recognizes that I recognize it and it flees? Completely convoluted, I know. But these are my thoughts.

And speaking of thoughts. Last week I started thinking that if Mr. M didn’t ask me to be his girlfriend by the end of the month I was going to ask him to be my boyfriend. We have been acting like boyfriend/girlfriend for a while now, but we both agreed we wanted to take things slow. But lately I was feeling anxious and I had been asked out a couple of times (which is awkward). So, my plan was to buy some flowers and make a card that read…


But I didn’t have to.

This Friday, September 2 morning Mr. M and I woke up like a normal day. Normal except for the fact that when he was hugging me before we left for our days he asked me to be his girlfriend.

And I said yes.

Yours on a cloud they call nine,


Guest Blogger – 50ftManEatingWoman: Cheers!

(This post is part of an awesome series of awesome 25swf guest bloggers- read about them here!)

Despite any current circumstances, any potential issues, any life-changing events, or anything ever at all ever going on ever ever, one thing is consistently true- it’s good to have a little help from your friends.

Over fourth of July weekend, I had the wonderful opportunity to get away for a couple days and visit with some dear friends down the road a ways. Seeing these lovely ladies and catching up is always great. They are the type of girlfriends you can talk about anything with, who are always able to pick up right where you left off, whether it be hours, days, or months apart.

We talked over dinner, drinks, lunch, and cats about everything from politics to parties, work and SEX. And all of a sudden, mid-conversation on my second day out, I had an epiphany. No matter what the subject was, no matter if it was from my mouth or hers, the outcome was always the same. We related and agreed on EVERYTHING.

Not once did I ever feel misunderstood; never did I have to explain myself; in no way did I ever question her words. Even more amazing than all that, was the fact that I had this experience with more than one person! In the same weekend! (!!!!!!)

This special connection brought a lot to my attention. While I learned more and more about their lives and shared in good news and bad news alike, I learned an incredible amount about my own life. I shared the same stories, same concerns, and same feelings with each and was given the same connection and emotion in return. Though different words were said and different experiences shared, the sentiment was the still same.

They were there. We have all been there.

I imagine the number of times I thought “I know!” and “Me too!” was completely off the charts. Hearing the ways in which they were able to relate to my experiences and finding myself able to relate completely to those shared with me brought a lot of AHA! moments to light within my own self; understanding situations, reigning in emotions, and bringing the pieces of the puzzle closer together.

All of the answers to life’s problems are right there waiting to be found, but somehow they are so much harder to see until someone shows them to you. All of life’s answers lie within each other’s hearts… and what a swell place that is to keep them.

Confused? Need help? Trouble sorting things out? Looking for a second opinion? Longing to be told you’re not actually insane?

Piece of cake- just go where everybody knows your name.

On the highway to enlightenment,