I’m very close

I’m very close to buying my mom an eHarmony subscription, account, dealio. The woman has been single for…25 years. I am 25 years old. You do the math. (I only give you easy problems) I can’t even imagine my mom with another man. It weirds me out a little. But I want it for her. I want her to be happy (happier). Let me explain.

For years the reason for her singledom has been that she’s happy with her life and she doesn’t need anyone. She has said that sometimes she gets lonely, but not enough to put up with another person.

My mom has been married twice. She was not married when she got pregnant with me, at the age of 35. My dad was not too kind when that happened. I believe the words he told her, before he drove off were, “You need to think about how you got yourself in this situation.” He wanted her to have an abortion. She didn’t want to. 9 months later, Baby Girl (insert last name here) was born. I didn’t have a name when I went home from the hospital. I digress…

e harmonyMy mom needs a buddy. A pal. A man. A guy friend. A date. A wang.

She’s “happy” alone…but here’s the deal. She’s afraid to admit that she’s lonely. It makes her more lonely. But I can tell. I know this woman…and she is lonely.

She’s elluded to be curious about dating sites. She’s never took the leap before. Mainly because of money. Online love is expensive! $59.95 for one month on eharmony. I KNOW! Dannnng.

So I’m ______ this close to doing it. Her birthday is right around the corner. She will be 61. It’s about time she found an old fart to fart around with.

Yours hopeful for interwebz luv for my mama,


update: I bought the subscription and at first she was upset that I “wasted” my money…but knowing my mom, I let it sink in and she’s already talking about losing weight and getting ready to start going on dates and getting some free dinners. It’s a step, I’d say!


Technology and the power to exploit the creepers

This is the pretty much greatest thing ever…perhaps Creepy Bob will think twice before he acts all creepy again. Not only does this provide some entertainment value, it also is a really smart way to prevent stalking and have a records of Creepy Bob’s phone calls.

For the full story see Laughing Squid…and subscribe to it because it has all the best things anyways.

Guest Blogger – 1foot: Single And Not Looking, or Save Your Pity, Relationshipped Friends!

(This post is part of an awesome series of awesome 25swf guest bloggers- read about them here!)

I got asked out on a date a while ago. I accepted and we made plans. Then I thought about it some more and cancelled the date.

WHAT??!! But, 1foot, you’re… you know… *stage whisper* SINGLE…

Yep. I am! And I didn’t like the guy who asked and knew I wouldn’t be interested in him no matter how many dinners we had and… the list goes on.

I wanted to write about why I’m happy that I’m single, but it’s hard to write such things without sounding sort of dippy or defensive. But, so it’s out there in the most direct way possible – I’m happy I’m single right now, and I’m not saying that in a dippy or defensive way. I obviously still want someone to love me at some point in that relationshippy way; I’m not denying that that is a happy and fulfilling way to exist sometimes.

BUT Continue reading

The Dating Monster

I am not opposed to people meeting online. I mean, technically that’s how I got to know Mr. M. My friend told me about him and I looked up his work, friended him on Vimeo, and the rest is history. But real dating sites kind of scare me. Like a monster under my bed, I know there’s nothing to be scared of, but it’s because I don’t look under there and create my own scenarios of what lies beneath.  But it’s not really the site, it’s the idea of…dating. I’m not a good “dater.” It’s just a fact. I don’t know how to really “date” people…I get to know someone and then I either want to be with them or I don’t; a common affliction of a serial monogamist.

Mr. M is the first relationship in my life where we have taking things uber slow, but not dumb slow. I’ve known him since March, and usually by this time we’d be saying the big four letter word (you know, LOooooVE) to each other. But we’re holding off. We haven’t even talked about it. And I know why…because we feel the same way about it. We want to wait for it.

All this to say/ramble on, I think dating sites are really great for a lot of people. I read this on Mashable.com today and it got me thinking about all of the ways you can meet someone. Who’s to say one way is better than the next? Have you ever dated someone you met online? Would you recommend it?

location-based dating Yours world wide web-wondering,


Guest Blogger – BibleBeltRebel: On this date in History

(This post is part of an awesome series of awesome 25swf guest bloggers- read about them here!)

Guess what we are fortunate enough to be alive for????? 11.11.11! Yep. A date. That consists of a repetitious number.

Ok, so maybe that doesn’t seem like such a big damn deal to you but I bet you know at least one person who’s making a big damn deal about it! Afterall it really is a rare occurrence…a once in a century occurrence. Which translates into one of two things in this “neck of the woods” …

1.) People start stocking up their apocalypse bunkers, and praying at stop lights.


2.) They run to the altar, stop taking their birth control and start practicing procreation.

Regardless of which of these options you chose (or get suckered into by redneck brain wa[r]sh)  you can be sure that for the next oh, 100 freakin’ years…you’re going to be asked… “Where were you on 11.11.11?”

Which brings me to the point of this blog… Continue reading