Guest Blogger – firstand25:Yo Peeps of 25swf!!

(This post is part of an awesome series of awesome 25swf guest bloggers- read about them here!)

When I was first approached to start blogging about my love, sex, and relationship life, I was scared. I don’t think I was scared of people reading about my personal experiences, or judging me, or anything like that, I think I was mostly scared to open myself up to let others in on what happens in my head every single day. I know if you don’t write openly and honestly, then you start to sound boring and rehearsed. Nobody is interested in listening to somebody give the half truth, they want all the raw, dirty details. I have no clear intention in my writing, just mainly thought it would be fun, but maybe the words I write will ring true to somebody reading them, maybe I’ll be able to bring comfort to someone struggling with the same things, or maybe I’ll provide a laugh, and who doesn’t like to laugh?

Anyway, I’m a freedom fighting, feministing, liberal, badass. So if I ever write something you disagree with, good! If you think I’m “totally right on”, great! Let’s fight, sisters!  Let’s fight for what we believe in, let’s fight for what’s right, let’s fight for the greater good, let’s fight for equality, let’s fight for all the little AND big girls out there, let’s fight to fight!!! Now…don’t get me wrong, I’m not a man hater, in fact, I love men, without them, we aren’t here. I’ve met some very caring, compassionate, and loving men in my life, and I LOVE that I know them. I’m a sucker for the nice guy(think Patrick Fugit in Almost Famous). It’s the fact of pinpointing that one best friend to spend the rest of your life with that’s the issue isn’t it?  But for now, let’s not think about this, let us cherish who we are, where we’ve been, the people we’ve met, and where we’re going…we’ll focus on the love and other stuff later on.

In any case, I have zero credentials for writing(except the fact that I’ve been SINGLE for a long time), I generally have terrible grammar, and I’m new to the writing online game, BUT,  I hope you enjoy what I have to say, and thanks for letting me ramble. I look forward to writing more.

– firstand25

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Guest Blogger – 27swf: The Sweet Spot

(This post is part of an awesome series of awesome 25swf guest bloggers- read about them here!)

This week I turned 28. And though age 28 often flies under the radar, it’s actually quite a significant birthday: it’s the year that one completes her first decade as an adult.

I started pondering where I am, 10 years in, and where I was, 10 years ago: I’ve got a College and Master’s degree, I’ve had great job experiences, including the one I’m in now, a career I love, wonderful friends, legs that run marathons & hike mountains. I know what foods give me heartburn, how to straighten my hair and how many drinks it takes for me to transform from sweet girl to pool shark (1.5 exactly).

In general, I’m feeling pretty great about who I’ve become.

Except, yesterday, I started thinking about that episode on Friends I saw just about 10 years ago. Rachel and Ross had just broken up (for the fifth time, probably). Rachel realizes she wants to have babies…with a husband…by age 32…and starts counting backwards, only to realize that she’d need to marry someone tomorrow to fulfill her life’s plan (how ironic, given real-life Jennifer Aniston’s own romantic trajectory).

I thought about Rachel and how I’m finally reaching that age — the age at which, ten years in, the biological clock is (whether I want to believe it) starting to tick. Slowly, but nonetheless, moving forward…

I remind myself that I look young and feel even younger than I am. But the hard numbers don’t lie. There are risks to waiting for pregnancy, not to mention articles like this one  that encourage me to believe I’m becoming a less desirable mate, spouse, life partner, whatever with each passing day.

So what’s a girl to do? Cry (in your car, on the phone, in front of the TV). Online date? Or, my favorite, ask your friends to set you up, only to hear them laugh (because they’re married/in a relationship and don’t understand) or reply with the equally frustrating “I wish I was still single — go out! Have fun! This is the best time of you’re life!”

I feel like I’m in the sweet spot of being old enough to know how old I’m not (yes, age 30, I see you giving me the death stare from across the room). But, I’m also old enough to know that I’m young…and that more awaits me…at least I hope.

As I get older, my standards get higher because, well, it just takes a lot more to impress me. Call me an a**hole, but I’ve never been one to settle, and the more accomplished I become, the more unaccomplished people there are below me. At 18, I was happy to be with someone in college, at 21 I was happy to date someone who went to college, at 23, he needed to have a college degree, and a job. At 25, I wanted someone with a college degree, a job, and real career goals. Now, at 28? I’m looking for someone who has all the above…and more. A real salary would be nice too. I see myself getting more picky, all the while feeling like I’m becoming less attractive to the opposite sex.  Most people reading this will say that my cynicism and expectations are making me less attractive. Well, sorry. That’s just how I feel.

Call me crazy. But these days, I just find myself sort of depressed by the whole scenario —

While I may be in the sweet spot, lately, I’m feeling rather bitter…

Yours,

27swf

My confession

Soooooo, I have something to confess.

Ya know how my name is 25 single white female?

Well…When I started this blog I was NOT 25. I was actually 23, about to turn 24.

And the confession, welp, I turn 25 this week. So what am I going to do after next year? Welp, be 26 single white female, silly!

cat birthday cake

Don't judge...who doesn't like cat birthday cake pictures? Exactly.

Turning 25 is really, stupidly exciting to me. I know it’s not supposed to be a big birthday, but to me it’s the ultimate 20-year-old birthday. Better than 21. At 21 you are still really dumb. In terms of most things in your life, you are still immature and now you can drink, woopidy doo-da. I’m not an alcoholic, so I didn’t really care. It’s just more convenient to be over 21.

But 25. Oh, twenty-five. You glorious beautifully solid, odd number you. 25 is graceful.

25 is experienced. 25 is experiencing. 25 is wiser. 25 is mid-twenties. 25 is confident. And my favorite part about 25…

25 is brain solidfying.

What do I mean by that, you ask? Intriguing, I know!

It’s science! The frontal lobe is the last part of the brain to fully develop around age 25 and has the highest plasticity throughout life, meaning that it can easily change connection and make new ones. And why do we care about the frontal lobe? Well! **Bill Nye the Science Guy enters from stage left** Frontal cortex is said to process reasoning and decision making. hmmmm…

So here are my Top 25 things that I’m excited about being 25 for!

25 Reasons Why the Age 25 is the Shiat.

25- Once you turn 25, car insurance companies can lower your rates, because statistically car accidents go down. Plus they like the sciencey part of your brain being fully developed (and Bill Nye).

24- After the age of 25 you start to slowly lose your memory. Some would say this is a negative. I don’t know about you, but I’m just going to use that as an excuse in sticky situations. OH, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pay that bill late…I’m 25, losing my memory. SEEeee.

23- My chance of getting a divorce goes down by almost half! DANNNNNGGGGG. I don’t want to get divorced, so I’ll take it. So far, so good.

22- 25 is hot. Period.

21- I’m not in school and have been working out in the real world for a couple of years. I’m getting a hold on this strange thing called life.

20- It’s time to start doing the shit I’ve always said I’ve wanted to do. I’m kind of already doing it.

19- I can rent a car without crap going down like extra deposits or whatever they drum up.

18- 25 years of experience under your belt of a lot of things. You could be considered the master of some things. The Master of Walking. The Master of Breathing. The Master of…Sleeping. It’s really up to what you are feeling like claiming. And proud of. I’m proud of my capability to fall asleep instantly-I’ve had a lot of practice.

17- For ladies, you are half way there to becoming a part of the Red Hat Society. I already have my application filled out.

16- I’m almost home free of mental illness! 1 in 5 US adults have mental illness. BUT in a study the 18-25 age group was reported as having the most mental illness, and more women than men were afflicted. 25 is one year close to being home-free!

15- It just sounds cool. Say 23 outloud. DUMB. Twenty-four. Um, who cares? 25. Wow.

14- 25 is half way to 50. I better make these next 25 count.

13- According to Wikipedia, twenty-five is is the natural number following 24 and preceding 26.

12- The Atomic Number 25 is Maganese, a hard brittle grey polyvalent metallic element that resembles iron but is not magnetic; used in making steel; occurs in many minerals. And that’s just bad ass.

11- 25 is a square number. 5² = 5 × 5

10- 25 is also the day that Christmas is on, and even if you’re not religious (like me) it still has a special feeling associated with it. Happiness.

9- The Sun rotates once in 25 days near the poles and about 30 days near its equator.

8- $0.25 is the best coin. I feel rich when I find a quarter.

7- I could be in the United States House of Representatives- 25 is the minimum age! Watch out Washington!

6- When Orson Welles was 25 years old he directed directed and starred in Citizen Kane.

5- After May 1 I will have said I ran a full marathon at the age of 25. Definitely never thought that would happen.

4- 25 is a great age to be single. Why? Because you have that awesome brain all developed and you can make super smart decisions about YOUR future!

3- Like Daft Punk says, you are harder better, faster, stronger.

2- I think I’ll reiterate the fact that is sounds cool. Tweeeeennnnntttttyyyyyyy-fiveeee. Yup, it still does even all slowed down.

1- And the #1 reason turning 25 is the shiat! Because YOU MAKE IT BE THE SHIAT!

Yours celebrating all of these reasons,

25swf